The camera never lies… Or does it !?!?…

Is It Just Me ??

First of all I should apologise, as this is a bit of a bemused whinge and moan post, but is it JUST me who’s family appear totally oblivious that someone in their midst actually takes pictures !?!?!…

It all started a few years back when my better half was talking to a friend of ours, who’d been looking at my photos on Flickr… and my wife’s response was “Oh, you’ve been looking at his snapshots then”…. Hmmmmm…. Now I have no delusions at all that I’m anywhere near “professional photographer” standards, but I do consider myself to be out of nappies / diapers, and as such, well past the “snapshot” phase… Anywho… I let that one slide…

The worst though, and it still annoys me when I think about it, was when only last year my wife decided she wanted some portrait shots taken… So what did she do ??… Did she ask me to take some “snaps”… Nope, she went and PAID a so called “professional” £300 (nearly $500) for a “burnt while you wait” CD of 12 un-edited pictures… and couldn’t understand why I was ever so slightly annoyed / put out by this… OH, and I’m not just being unkind here, but the pictures were NOT good…

I mention this all now… as my daughter is currently doing a project for school, and she’s chosen to do it on a local nature reserve where I have spent many an hour with the camera, photographing the wildlife and scenery (as above)… and consequently have a whole host of shots from the area… Yup, you’ve probably guessed what’s coming next… Despite my collection of images of the wildlife and surrounding reserve itself, my wonderfully supportive family are currently trawling the internet looking for suitable pictures to download for use in her project !?!?…

So I ask… Is it JUST me that suffers this indignity, where those closest to us seem utterly oblivious to what we have a passion for ???…

Btw… Don’t panic… Although the facts are true, this is more of a “tongue in cheek” whinge… and certainly nothing serious… ;)


50 responses

  1. Ahh yes…I do understand how that must be a wee slap in the face. Not sure I can ‘splain it either. I think it goes back to the old addage (that I shall fumble) “we are least appreciated by those we are closest to”. I suck at remembering the exct phrase. My son returned home from a weekend on the coast with his cousin and raved over his Aunt’s photography. Not sure he’s ever been particularly appreciative of mine. Lol

    I suspect they mean no insult by it all round even so :)

    June 12, 2011 at 4:38 pm

    • Hey !!… Aren’t you forgetting “Wow, what a nice picture”… lol… ‘Tis funny though isn’t it, and I’m glad it’s not JUST me… Thanks G.. :)

      June 12, 2011 at 4:52 pm

  2. Nope, sad to say it, Brian, but it isn’t just you. Sigh. I get what you get as well as the opposite. My family is constantly sending me images/slideshows that OTHER photographers have taken with the ‘aren’t these amazing?!’. Some are, but most are crap.

    On the other hand, my family is known to ask me to take pictures BUT they then sqwack at the idea that I might actually want to get paid for doing so! I’ve learnt to say NO gracefully citing that my schedule is simply too full.

    June 12, 2011 at 4:53 pm

    • Haha.. Yeah I get that too from some people… My daughter was recently invited to a party at the last minute, and I was asked “Oh, and you’re coming too aren’t you, and can you bring your camera”…. Ummmm… NO !!…. lol…. ;)

      June 12, 2011 at 5:00 pm

  3. I am fortunate because my family has done nothing but praise me and encourage me to better images and brought me photos to try and challenges to face.
    However, I hear horror stories of spouseal criticism of my student’s work each and every week in class. How is anyone to achieve when they have to create to a negative comment?
    If I had your daughter’s project, I would not be surfing for photos on the net. Number one reason? …and I HOPE they READ this comment! ……is that you would think she would want a body of work that compositionally fits together and that could be achieved by using your photography; each and every photo from the same photographer.
    Oh….. from me ?…. I’d rather you photograph my children than any pro I know, here, dear blogger friend.

    June 12, 2011 at 5:03 pm

    • Thanks so much Leslie, that’s very kind of you to say… :D Well fortunately I don’t suffer criticism, just the lack of anything else… lol… So I guess it’s not that bad… It doesn’t really bother me though, as I enjoy what I do, but occasionally I do like to have a bit of a “tongue in cheek” whine…

      June 12, 2011 at 5:23 pm

  4. What?? I hope your better half learned her lesson and will never ever pay that much for not-good pictures again (I would have threatened divorce if my husband had done this ;-) )
    And, as far as your daughter’s project, I think you should hand her the camera and drag her out there to take her own pictures.
    My nephew and his wife were nice enough to sucker me into taking pictures at their wedding last year, thinking I would just hand over a CD with all the files. Um, NO! And thanks to mean little ol’ me, they never did see all the pictures… and they’re not going to, either!

    June 12, 2011 at 5:24 pm

    • Ahhhh… Yeah I guess being appreciated and recognised by those around us does also have it’s negatives too eh… lol… I’m with you though, and have been known to leave my camera at home during certain “family” occasions… ;)

      June 12, 2011 at 5:33 pm

  5. Great Pic!

    My girlfriend and her family is awesome when it comes to support for my hobby. So is my one sister and her boyfriend. My mother tries a bit but never really understands. She thinks the camera does all the work. So she just bought a D7000 and 18-200 lens. :)

    June 12, 2011 at 5:59 pm

    • That’s all good stuff Charlie… It sure does help when you’ve got people backing your hobby… I’m not really complaining too much though, it’s more of a light hearted observation of sorts… ;)

      June 12, 2011 at 8:44 pm

  6. I totally understand where you are coming from. My sister can look at my posts and NEVER make a comment. My husband friends support me more than my family does–that includes parents–they just look at the photos and say, “That’s nice.” I don’t get it. Beautiful photo BTW!!

    June 12, 2011 at 7:04 pm

    • Thanks so much.. Well it’s pretty clear that it’s not just me then… lol… Fortunately I don’t allow it to put me off doing what I enjoy… Thanks for your comment… :)

      June 12, 2011 at 8:45 pm

  7. Your work is amazing, F.S. – I can imagine how that would be incredibly frustrating!
    Even as a total amateur I get annoyed. People seem amazed by some low res image they’ve found on Google (with the same tired filters thrown at it). Quick! Load some of the lowest quality paper possible into the $50.00 printer and make multiple pixilated copies to pass out. Hang one on the wall. Save one for next years Christmas card. And give a copy to Robert. ‘He’ll like this. He likes pictures. Maybe he can try this.’

    June 12, 2011 at 7:44 pm

    • HAHA… Well firstly thanks for the compliment SIG… And you’re so right about how amazed people are by images that we KNOW are nothing special on sooooo many fronts… Show them a copy of a copy of a copy of a copy of a kitten smelling a flower and they’ll have kittens themselves, but show them a properly good and artistic shot of early morning mist rolling down a forested hillside in to a flat calm lake, and the’re bemused by the lack of kittens !!!…. ;)

      June 12, 2011 at 8:52 pm

  8. Hmm… I actually just shot my sister’s wedding, and had the greatest time doing it! My family is in another country though, so I don’t see them as much. My irish family (i.e. the almost-in-laws) though, they are very happy to have a photographer at hand, albeit one that lives on the other side of the country. What I do is take pictures of the kids and send them to their mums, and they always love it. So no, no such issues as you’re having! And I agree with a previous poster, drag your daughter out and let her get her own shots for her project, it’ll be great for her!

    June 12, 2011 at 7:47 pm

    • Thanks Simone… That must have been fun shooting the wedding… I’ve done a couple too, but never really enjoyed the stress of having to make sure that every shot was perfect… As for my in-laws… well I’m pretty sure they don’t even know I own a camera… lol… And lol… I would have dragged my daughter out this weekend if hadn’t been a real grotty weekend… ;)

      June 12, 2011 at 8:58 pm

  9. Kieran Hamilton

    I think I’m lucky enough that my girlfriend at least feigns an interest in my pictures, until I start getting technical that is!

    Love the shot by the way, surely worthy of a school project, at least?!

    June 12, 2011 at 9:28 pm

    • LOL.. Thanks Kieran… Well I guess faking it is better than nothing… ;)

      June 13, 2011 at 5:21 pm

  10. Ah, I guess, you could ask your wife why she didn’t ask you to take portraits of her and ask your daughter why she didn’t ask you for your images for her project. Their answers might enlighten you some where or another. You can sense the truth when you hear one ;)

    I am a BIG fan of your images Brian! May be not all of them but some. I would definitely consider you as a pro! :)

    Big Hugs!

    June 13, 2011 at 2:30 am

    • Haha… Oh trust me Attiev, at £300 a CD, I asked… lol… As for my daughter, well she does actually enjoy my photography, but was doing the whole “not thinking” child thing… ;)

      Oh, and thanks so much for the “pro” compliment… :D

      June 13, 2011 at 5:30 pm

  11. Have you actually shown them the pictures you take? Because this shot is stunning! I want to be there! What colors!
    Luckily in my case my father had a fling with photography when he was young, so he’s fully supportive of what I do. And although it’s probably because they’re my parents, they like the pictures I show them.
    Maybe you should print a few photos and hang them around the house, then your family would see your work every day…

    June 13, 2011 at 4:50 am

    • Oh they’ve seen plenty of my images, of that you can be sure… I guess not everyone gets it though… lol… but I am happy to say that my daughter does also enjoy photography, and I’m trying where possible to nurture that interest… :)

      June 13, 2011 at 5:32 pm

  12. Firstly, this photograph is absolutely beautiful. I love the clouds and reflections. Secondly, I try and involve my partner in my photography, by showing him my photographs, mostly, I get an “that’s nice” or I’ll be speaking about something I photographed and he’ll be looking at me with a glazed look. He hardly looks at my photographs, doesn’t even know my website address!! Yet, he’s subscribed to another photographer’s website and often comments to me about how amazing their work is. I often think why do I bother? perhaps I should quit, but then I think, why should I, I do this for me. It’s my form of escapism.

    None of my family show much of an interest if I’m honest, although I have an Uncle who studied art when he was younger and he always praises me. He always says how proud he is of me and how my grandparents would be, if they were still alive. Which means so much to me, as my Grandfather was a keen photographer.

    It’s rather comforting to me to read your post and other comments as I now feel that I’m not so alone.

    I hope your daughter changes her mind, your photographs are more than worthy!!

    June 13, 2011 at 1:35 pm

    • Well I do manage to get my daughter involved quite a bit, and at the moment she enjoys the opportunity to join me… I’m not sure if that’s a genuine interest in photography, or if it’s just the opportunity she gets to sometimes stay out late… lol… but either way I’ll try to nurture her interest… She has her own camera now too, which helps… ;)

      I wholly recognise the “that’s nice” response though… lol.. but that’s pretty insane your partner seems to admire other peoples work more than your own… I’d guess / hope it’s the whole familiarity thing… I’ve had similar thoughts too about why do I bother, but fortunately also come back to the “I do it for me” response… and what better reason is there… :D

      You’re right though, I actually posted this as more of a “tongue in cheek” semi humorous whinge, but was quite surprised how many others seem to be in a similar position… Guess I’ll also not feel quite so alone either… Thanks Samantha… ;)

      June 13, 2011 at 5:45 pm

  13. Great shot! I’m not married, so I can’t offer any input, but lovely shot :)

    June 13, 2011 at 3:19 pm

    • Enjoying the shot is good enough for me… lol… Thanks Eden… :)

      June 13, 2011 at 5:46 pm

  14. Nye

    Brian, when I read your post I could not believe. I’ve always admired your work, and perhaps it’s time to claim your title as a professional photographer! :)

    June 13, 2011 at 6:01 pm

    • Haha… That’s very kind of you to say Nye… Guess I need people to buy my work first though to really qualify… lol… ;)

      June 14, 2011 at 4:45 pm

  15. Wow, this post of yours seems to have touched a nerve! I guess I don’t have much of a “rep” yet as a photographer, so I haven’t really experienced what you are talking about. My hubby has never been into photography or pictures, so it is just as well that I am the family photog. We all know you do awesome work, and hopefully your girls will remember it too.

    June 13, 2011 at 6:09 pm

    • You’re right there Karen… Kinda surprised me actually that “anyone” else had the same problem… lol… I thought this was very much going to be a “whoa, not going there” kinda post… How wrong was I… lol… It is comforting to know that it’s not just me though, and I think other people might have thought “thank goodness it’s not only me” as well… Here’s hoping you continue to get all the support you currently do… :)

      June 14, 2011 at 4:50 pm

      • I wouldn’t say I get support, unfortunately, unless you are talking about the support from this awesome blogging community. I think I get “put up with” – as in, “there she goes taking pictures again; well, let her have her fun.”

        June 14, 2011 at 10:03 pm

        • Lol… Well put up with is still good… At least they realise you take pictures… ;) and I have a feeling that your support will develop nicely in proportion to your “rep”… which itself has developed quite nicely already… :)

          June 14, 2011 at 10:45 pm

  16. No, it’s not just you. I’m sorry to say I experience similar treatment, and it’s mostly from family. In fact, my friends know more about my photography than my family does. The exception is my husband, who decided to learn matting and framing so he could mat and frame some of my photos. He probably looks at those photos more than I do.

    Maybe that’s the solution. I should set all of my family to work matting and framing. ;)

    June 13, 2011 at 7:41 pm

    • Thanks Robin… It’s odd isn’t it how family seem oblivious… but great news you managed to get your husband involved… I did try to get my wife involved years ago, and actually bought her a camera…. but she was never bitten by the bug… At least the signs are that my daughter will develop in to it… Time will tell… :)

      June 14, 2011 at 4:53 pm

  17. aswirly

    Sigh…I ‘m so sorry B. I’m rather fortunate to come from a pretty artistic family, so they tend to support my endeavors, but I know many people where this is not the case. One friend of mine is always drawing and painting and he loves to share his work, but his wife makes mean comments about it and rolls her eyes whenever he gets started. It’s sad. You know how it saddens me that you recieve such a lack of support. I hope all the feedback here encourages you a little and makes you see you’re not alone in this problem. I mean, seriously, you’re awesome. Just LOOK at this shot??!!! It’s wonderful!

    June 13, 2011 at 8:16 pm

    • LOL… Thanks so much A…. Means a lot to me you know…. and having this level of feedback kinda shocked me… lol… I’d never have imagined that so many wonderful photographers suffer similar indignities… You sure are fortunate (and very deserving) to get the support you do… :)

      June 14, 2011 at 4:55 pm

  18. Jayne

    When my older daughter said she was getting married last year I waited for the request to do her photos. It never came. Instead she asked an acquaintance from her now husband’s work who has aspirations to do it professionally. I kept quiet but I’m afraid I was pretty hurt. When the photos came back they were *dreadful* – not sour grapes, they were blurred, badly lit, none were edited to make any improvements to the gaffs that were made and there were even two head shots of the photographer quite literally gurning unpleasantly into the camera. My daughter was in floods of tears and I was enlisted to do what I could with the images. Collecting together my and my other daughter’s point and shoot images and many hours of Photoshop work on the ‘professional’ photos, we got together an album. I couldn’t resist saying that I just wished she’d asked me in the first place. It turns out that she didn’t want to put that pressure on me and thought that getting images in which I appeared would be problematical.

    So it’s not quite the same but yes, I do understand how you feel. Reading some of the comments above it seems it’s all too common to take for granted the obvious talents of our own family members and I’m not sure what the solution is. I think my younger daughter probably gets it more as she has often been enlisted as a model on photoshoots when I get ‘people photography’ ideas. Maybe that’s the answer: get your crew to dress up and model more often and then put the resulting photos up on the walls as a reminder of your skills!

    (You shot is, as usual, beautiful. At least *we* appreciate you)!

    June 14, 2011 at 4:08 pm

    • Oh yes, I remember you blogging about having to edit all of those pictures, just to save the day…. NOT a very good scenario at all, and definitely a kick in the teeth not to have been asked, but I guess her motives at least were honourable… It is strange though how people don’t consider our feelings eh… And I do already invlove my eldest daughter as much as possible, as she has an interest in it at the moment… Thanks so much Jayne… :)

      June 14, 2011 at 4:58 pm

  19. Ohh no! LOL!!! i don’t mean to laugh at you luv…It’s just that I can relate…as a parent and all. if it’s any consolation, you remain one of my very favorite photographers! In fact, I’m very surprised to hear you say that you’re not a professional photographer. Really? Well, if you’re not, then you should be. You could make a fortune mate!

    June 15, 2011 at 2:42 pm

    • Nope… Definitely not a professional… lol… but thank you so much for the compliment Natalie… It was meant to be a semi humorous whine though, so you’ll be pleased to hear that laughing is very much allowed… ;)

      June 16, 2011 at 4:44 pm

  20. Gorgeous shot, Brian! :) Love the reflection, and the colors in the sky are awesome!

    June 16, 2011 at 5:01 am

    • Thanks so much Anne, it was quite the pleasant evening that’s for sure… :)

      June 16, 2011 at 4:44 pm

  21. Val

    First off, I absolutely LOVE the photo here. Gorgeous. :)
    Now… maybe your daughter doesn’t want the pics she uses to be associated with her dad (in other words, parents aren’t always cool with the mates, y’know?), rather than it being any slur on your photographic abilities. And your wife getting pics done professionally… maybe she’d always wanted to spend x amount of quid on professional photos. Also, might not be about your abilities or otherwise.

    My husband takes brilliant shots of landscapes but he feels uncomfortable photographing people and so when he does take photos of them, he likes them to be ‘arty’… so I don’t often ask him to photograph anyone as I like ‘normal’ shots, rather than arty ones, of events… so that I can remember them as I experienced them. On the other hand, sometimes I take some of his pics and ‘adjust’ them in photoshop, to make them look more arty, lol!

    My own photos are getting better thanks to my new camera but I still don’t have much confidence as a photographer. Nevertheless, when I get a good shot and someone says ‘nice snap’ it makes me really, really annoyed!

    So anyway, sympathies all round for the whinges. Or should that be for the ‘tongue in cheek’ whinges. ;)

    June 17, 2011 at 8:47 pm

    • You may have a point Val, but fortunately I know my daughter actually loves my pics, and did a project ON photography because of that a few months back, and all the pictures she insisted on using were mine… so that was nice… As for the portraits though… I have no idea…. lol… as I’ve happily done plenty of portraits myself too….

      June 17, 2011 at 9:40 pm

  22. Beautiful photo!! Just found your blog by the happenstance. Most of the oblivion to my photos comes from my friends. They think ‘snapshots’ not photographs. I, however, am fortunate with my family because they not only support me but actively encourage me. My daughter and I directly compete in our local county fair against each other in photography. But, nobody asks me to take portraits or other people pictures because, quite frankly, I stink at it!! Since I don’t enjoy doing it, I don’t work at improving it.

    June 28, 2011 at 10:05 pm

    • Thanks so much Ted… It sure is great when your family are 100% behind you, and I’m still working well on my eldest daughter… She does still enjoy coming out on little photographic expeditions with me, and has her own camera too… so there’s still hope… lol…

      July 3, 2011 at 7:03 pm

  23. Dedy Iswanto a.k.a Didex

    STUNNING,,, What a wonderful view…. Love These image Brian

    July 3, 2011 at 7:04 pm

  24. Chloe [Photographer]

    i think at some stage we’ve all suffered this lack of appreication from someone in our lives
    i’ve just stumbled upon your blog and i think you’re a superb photographer
    this photo had me looking at it for ages

    July 14, 2011 at 12:34 am

    • Thank you so much Chloe, and thank you so much for stumbling by… It’s so true though isn’t it… unfortunately… ;)

      July 14, 2011 at 7:18 am

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